Wednesday 20 April 2011

Punk Rock Tear Ups

Going round to a friends armed with a clutch of 7" singles and blasting them out the window, down the street, through the station, beyond the pub, over Marine Parade, over the beach and out there to the wild blue yonder!!!

Top 5 Tear Up Tunes

1. We are all Prostitutes - The Pop Group
2. Complete Control - The Clash
3. In the City - The Jam
4. Smash it Up - The Damned
5. City Hobgoblins - The 'Mighty' Fall

Monday 18 April 2011

Captain Scarlet & The Mysterons

This is the future, our future:

With the curtains drawn, french windows open and the low hum of a lawnmower cutting through the spring calm, I was transported every Saturday morning to my future, our future.

The year is 2068… A team of Zero-X astronauts are investigating the surface of Mars after unidentified radio signals emanating from the planet are detected on Earth. The source is discovered to be an extraterrestrial base, which is attacked and destroyed when the explorers mistake a harmless sensor device for a weapon. The inhabitants of the settlement, the Mysterons, are sentient computers that form a collective consciousness. They are the remnants of the original Mysteron race, extraterrestrial life forms that originated in a galaxy other than the Milky Way and maintained their colony on Mars for 3,500 years before understandably abandoning the planet at the turn of the 20th century. Possessing a rather handy partial control over matter, the Mysteron computers draw on their power of "reversing matter" to rebuild the complex before vowing revenge for the unwarranted aggression.

Reversing matter, also described as "retro-metabolism", allows the Mysterons to re-create the likeness of a person or object in the form of a facsimile that is under their control. This ability is used to conduct a "war of nerves" against Earth, in which the Mysterons issue threats against specific targets (from world leaders and military installations to whole cities and continents) and then destroy and reconstruct whatever instruments are required (whether human or machine) to execute their plans. The presence of the Mysterons is indicated by two circles of green light (the "Mysteron rings") that trail across scenes of destruction and reconstruction. Although the Mysterons are able to manipulate events from Mars, their actions on Earth are usually performed by their replicated intermediaries.

The leading Mysteron agent is of course Zero-X mission leader Captain Black. He is killed and reconstructed during the incident on Mars. Previously, Black had held the rank of senior officer in Spectrum, an international security organisation inaugurated in 2067 that mobilises all its personnel, vehicles and other resources in response to the Mysteron threat. Spectrum is led from Cloudbase, an airborne headquarters positioned at a height of 40,000 feet above the Earth's surface, and has outposts in all major cities. The organisation employs operatives of many nationalities, of whom the most senior hold military ranks and colour-based codenames, are stationed on Cloudbase, and answer directly to the commander-in-chief of Spectrum, Colonel White. Cloudbase is defended by the Angels, an interceptor aircraft squadron, and the organisation boasts a fleet of Spectrum Pursuit Vehicles (SPV) hidden in secret locations across the world.

Captain Scarlet becomes Spectrum's foremost weapon in its fight against the Mysterons after the battle on Mars, in which the Mysterons threaten to assassinate the World President as their first act of retaliation. The original Scarlet is killed in a car accident engineered by the Mysterons and replaced with a Mysteron reconstruction. However, when the Scarlet duplicate is shot by Spectrum officer Captain Blue and falls to his death from a tall structure, it returns to life with the consciousness of its human template restored, and is thereafter free from Mysteron control. Scarlet's ex-Mysteron body possesses two remarkable abilities: he is able to sense the presence of other Mysteron duplicates in his vicinity, and if he is injured or killed, retro-metabolism restores him to a state of top health. Now able to deploy suicidally reckless tactics to thwart Mysteron threats, Scarlet repeatedly braves the pain of death in the knowledge that he will recover to face the Mysterons once more. (As an aside it should be noted that the existential horror of perpetual life was never explored in too much detail…)

While Scarlet and Spectrum defend Earth against the threat from Mars, it is found that Mysteron reconstructions are particularly vulnerable to electricity and that they are detectable on X-rays, to which their biology is impervious. Consequently, two anti-Mysteron devices, the "Mysteron Gun" and the "Mysteron Detector," are developed to aid Spectrum. A three-episode story arc charts the uncovering of a second Mysteron complex under construction on the Moon, its destruction by Spectrum, and efforts to negotiate with the Mysterons on Mars via a crystal power source, salvaged from the complex, which is converted into an interplanetary communication device. A failed attempt at satellite surveillance of the Martian surface, aborted military conferences and the sabotaged construction of a new space fleet hinder Spectrum's plans to return to Mars, and the organisation is unsuccessful on two occasions in apprehending Captain Black. The penultimate episode of the series depicts a Mysteron assault on Cloudbase with the use of armed spacecraft, which is ultimately revealed to be a nightmare dreamt by one of the Angel pilots. The finale is a flashback episode that ends inconclusively with regards to the war between Earth and Mars and the fate of Spectrum and the Mysterons.

The real names of the Spectrum officers who gave their all to protect us from the Mysteron threat…

Codename, Real name, Nationality
Captain Scarlet, Paul Metcalfe, British
Captain Blue, Adam Svenson, American
Colonel White, Charles Gray, British
Captain Black, Conrad Turner, British
Lieutenant Green,Seymour Griffiths, Trinidadian
Captain Ochre, Richard Fraser, American
Captain Magenta, Patrick Donaghue, Irish
Captain Grey, Bradley Holden, American
Doctor Fawn, Edward Wilkie, Australian
Destiny Angel, Juliette Pontoin, French
Symphony Angel, Karen Wainwright, American
Rhapsody Angel, Dianne Simms, British
Melody Angel, Magnolia Jones, American
Harmony Angel, Chan Kwan, Japanese

Smarties (Take 2)

You'd be foolish not to... Well, it is the Easter Weekend coming up!

Friday 15 April 2011

Dreamtime...

Tangerine dusk, slipping into the old bus depot
with only one journey on my mind...

The Art of being an English Gentlemen (part 8)

Roll over, roll back, inhale & recall...

A month or so of sobriety botched in a thrice. Rummage through mohair jacket to find a boarding pass, some dollars and a pair of black persol sunglasses. Plonk sunglasses on, throw blinds open, recoil in horror at the city below and plunge into white hot shower. Resurface 20 minutes later in black merino turtle neck, slate grey mohair suit, stout black brogues, head back to bedroom to find dark brown arm floating up from under the sheets.

Kiss arm and still raw lips, make excuses and head to the nearest bar with the longest champagne list. Start at the beginning and plough on through...

A snatched memory of an air hostess and a late night bar. That's fine, that's good. The only question is...

What am I doing in Istanbul?

Poll Results - Bond Villains

"No Mister Bond, I expect you to die!"

1 - Ernst Stavro Blofeld
2 - Sir Hugo Drax
3 - Goldfinger
4 - Dr No
5 - Count Lippe

James Bond novel #3 - Moonraker

Without doubt Moonraker is the most underestimated of the Bond novels, probably because it was one of the few early books that wasn’t adapted for film until much later (and a fairly lamentable adaptation it was too, with Roger Moore gooning his way through a very poor script and the normally excellent Michael Lonsdale playing a demented Drax).

The novel begins with M asking James Bond to investigate the multi-millionaire businessman Sir Hugo Drax, who is winning a lot of money playing bridge at M's favourite club, Blades. M suspects Drax of cheating, but although claiming indifference, he is concerned why a multi-millionaire and national hero, such as Sir Hugo, would cheat at a card game. Bond confirms Drax's deception and manages to "cheat the cheater" — aided by a cocktail of powdered Benzedrine mixed with non-vintage champagne and a deck of stacked cards — winning £15,000 and infuriating the out-smarted Drax.

Drax is the product of a mysterious background, unknown even to himself (allegedly). As a supposed British soldier in WWII, he was badly injured, and stricken with amnesia, in the explosion of a bomb planted by a German saboteur at his field headquarters. After extensive rehabilitation in an army hospital, however, he would eventually return home to become a major aerospace industrialist.

Now, Drax and his firm are building the "Moonraker", Britain's first nuclear missile project, intended to defend the United Kingdom against its Cold War enemies (c.f. the real Blue Streak missile). Essentially, the Moonraker rocket is an upgraded V-2 rocket using liquid hydrogen and fluorine as propellants. It can withstand the ultra-high combustion temperatures in its engine thanks to the use of columbite, of which Drax has a monopoly. Therefore, because the rocket's engine can withstand higher heat, the Moonraker can use more powerful fuels, greatly expanding its effective range.

After a Ministry of Supply security officer working at the project is shot dead, M assigns Bond to replace him, and also to investigate what may be going on at the missile-building base, which is located between Dover and Deal on the coast of England. Oddly, all of the rocket scientists working on the project seem to be German.

At his post on the complex (where he is billeted in the Drax mansion), Bond meets Gala Brand, a beautiful Special Branch agent working undercover as Personal Assistant to Drax. He also uncovers some clues concerning his predecessor's death, concluding that the former Security Chief might have been killed for witnessing the clandestine delivery of some secret cargo by submarine off the coast.

Drax's henchman Krebs is caught by Bond while he snoops through his room. Later, an attempted assassination nearly kills Bond and Gala under a landslide, as they swim beneath the Dover cliffs. Drax takes Gala to London where she discovers the truth about the "Moonraker" (by comparing her own launch trajectory figures with those in a notebook picked from Drax's pocket) - but she is caught. She soon finds herself captive at a secret radio station (intended to serve as a beacon for the missile's guidance system) in the heart of London. While attempting to rescue her in a car chase, Bond is captured, as well.

It turns out that Drax was never a British soldier and has never suffered from amnesia. In fact, he was a German commander of a Skorzeny commando unit and the saboteur (in British uniform) Graf Hugo von der Drache who set the bomb at the army field headquarters, only to be injured, himself, in the detonation. The amnesia story was simply a cover he used while recovering in hospital, in order to avoid allied retribution - though it would lead to a whole new British identity. Drax, however, remains a dedicated Nazi, bent on revenge against England for the wartime defeat of his Third Reich Fatherland and his prior history of social slights he suffered as a youth growing up in England before the war. He now means to destroy London with the very missile he has constructed for Britain, by means of a Soviet supplied nuclear warhead that has been secretly fitted to the "Moonraker". He also plays the stock market the day before to make a huge profit from the planned disaster.

Brand and Bond are imprisoned under the Moonraker's booster engines so as to leave no trace of them once the Moonraker is launched. But before this first (supposedly un-armed) test firing, Bond and Gala escape. Gala gives Bond the proper coordinates to reprogram the gyros and send the Moonraker into the sea. Having been in collaboration with Soviet Intelligence all along, Drax and his henchman attempt to escape by Russian submarine - only to be killed as the vessel flees through the very waters onto which the "Moonraker" has been re-targeted.

Later, after their de-briefing at headquarters, Bond meets up with Gala, expecting her company - but they part ways after Gala reveals that she is engaged to be married. It is the only Bond novel (discounting some of the short stories) in which Bond does not end up having a romantic relationship with the girl.

Moonraker is my favourite Bond novel, not least because there are no cinematic comparisons to blur the imagination. The Kent setting also resonates. In later years I couldn’t help but try and draw some comparisons between Sir Hugo Drax and Robert Maxwell, although for all of his many failings Maxwell was certainly never a Nazi!

Not a lot of people know that: The first adaption of Moonraker was on South African radio in 1956, with Bob Holness providing the voice of Bond. “I’ll have a consonant please M.”

Friday 1 April 2011

Dreaming - How I should live!

I should be living by the sea, only watching the BBC. Sitting on a 1950's sofa, whilst wearing Bass Weejun loafers. I should be painting angry self portraits, I should be riding a 1940's bicycle, listening to old blues on a battered dansette or grooving to hip tunes that I haven't written yet.

I should be living a purer life of honest endeavour with a beatnik wife. I should be writing stuff that rhymes, instead of stuff that wastes your time.

I should be living like this.