A perfect day in the perfect pub - #3

"The Place I love is a million miles away..."

Lunchtime at the cricket, lunchtime in the perfect pub and a distant dream time on the jukebox. The Jam's 'The Place I love'* is playing. One of my favourite Weller songs, it always reminds of George Orwell's 'Coming up for Air'. 

In which, the main character George Bowling decides to revisit the places of his childhood, in particular he plans to revisit a specific pond with a large fish in that he had tried to capture over 30 years ago. When Bowling returns, he finds the whole place unrecognisable. He eventually locates the old pub where he is due to stay but finds it much changed. His old family home has become a tea-shop. Only the church and the vicar appear unchanged. 

The saddest part is when Bowling sees his ex-girlfriend. She has been so ravaged by time that she is almost unrecognisable and utterly devoid of the qualities he once adored. She in turn, fails to recognise him at all.

Thankfully, 'The Place I love' lingers in utopian days of sanctuary despite the fact that: 

"... the place I love is overgrown now
with beautiful moss and colourful flowers
and goldfish that swim in a pool, there's a small brick wall
with neon lighting, controlled by lightning"

As my mind reaches out for the opening salvo of Rick Buckler's drums on A-bomb in Wardour Street that never arrives, a fish finger sandwich drenched in Heinz Salad Cream, Vinegar and Tabasco does. The barman knows to leave bottles of all three condiments on the table too. The thick cut chips were brought here directly from Mount Olympus and melt on contact with my tongue. A second pint of Guinness has also appeared in a blur of efficiency and gratitude. 

The good news from the cricket is that Jimmy Anderson has already bagged three early Aussie wickets. Meanwhile, Internazionale are interested in buying a decent goalkeeper from Genoa and an amateur British cyclist has been tipped as an outside hope for this year's tour. 

All this and it is only ten past one! 

*I know that 'The Place I love' was never released on 7" 

but this is a perfect day in a perfect pub....

The er... Cricket

You spend a decade (sort of) occasionally adding to your blog, touching on a whole host of topics near and far to/from your heart. All the while, one of the more abiding loves is consigned to the outer reaches and then... 

England win the World Cup with Ben Stokes virtually winning the game single-handedly and then, just six weeks later. With the Urn just about to metaphorically strap itself into a first class Qantas flight from Heathrow to Sydney. Ben Stokes plays one of, if not, the greatest innings of all time. 

Having just managed to struggle into work today after the 2am finish at Headingley, I am still trying to process what I and the rest of the cricket loving world has witnessed. 

• History - without a doubt! 
• Genius - absolutely! 
• Once in a lifetime - I doubt it will ever be matched in my remaining 25+ years!

A report on the game will appear on The Jardine Report in due course but for now, I just need to revel in the joy of keeping myself wedged in to the same sofa space for nearly four hours, whilst constantly playing the opening riff to The Trip (Naz Nomad and the Nightmares version) as a way to ward off the inevitable humbling at the hands of the Ol' Enemy. I also lobbed in the occasional jazz chord to confuse the Aussies but it seemed as though my trusted Fender Telecaster Deluxe (a la Coxon) was not quite up to the trick. 

As soon as Jack Leach (Aka Alan from Accounts) joined Ben Stokes, it was time to get ready for bed. A couple of heroically heaved sixes served only to prolong the agony. The reverse swept six into the Western Terrace was audacious/funny, the lap six against Cummins was a dash of real bravado but surely it couldn't sustain. 

Tim Paine persisted with Nathan Lyon (surely the wrong choice?), another straight six! And then a suicide single, Leach stranded, Lyon must surely... but he didn't. He bloody missed it... Next ball, plumb LBW, missing leg, missing off, hitting middle half way up! But no, the Umpire says no and no referral. Leach nurdles his one run contribution to the 76 run partnership. Cummins digs one shortish, Stokes murders it through the covers and bedlam ensues...

No other sport can do this, no other stupid combination of rules, protocol, physical, spiritual and mental anguish can combine to deliver such sporting perfection. And of course, the ultimate joy is that - nothing has been resolved. We are back to square one. Two matches to go, at a minimum England must win one and not lose any....

The Ashes again...

I love cricket, have done ever since I was introduced to the game by my Mum and Grandad in the early 1970's. That first explosion of awareness was stimulated by the fact that my county, Sussex, supplied the all-rounder Tony Greig (who went on to Captain and then ultimately leave (albeit with some justification) England) and equally importantly the opening bowler John Snow to the national team.

The thought of a local player playing against Australia for The Ashes was almost too much for me to contemplate. If J.A.Snow can do it, then surely so can I! No sooner had I gained a vague grasp of the game than I had also understood the importance of beating Australia. They hated us, for a myriad of not unreasonable reasons - our snobby club tie mentally, our pompous arrogance & the numerous perceived slights that built up over your the years. The Ashes has no real sporting comparison, it is; history, passion, bravery, David v Goliath, competition, sporting behaviour, unsporting behaviour, great wins, terrible defeats... and the list is as long as the narrative of this frustrating, mesmerising and wonderful game. 

This current series is no different. Australia's crushing win in the first test followed by the battle between Archer and Smith at Lords. Magical, compelling and harrowing all at once. Made all the more exciting by the sight of another Sussex man opening the bowling for England. The atmosphere at Lords was electric (very different to the World Cup Final) but electric nonetheless. A true sense of another page of cricket history being written...

Roll on Headingley, long live Test Match Cricket, Long live The Ashes

Ashes Victory Celebrations

Yesssss!!!!!!!!!!!

In the pubs and streets of South London, fuelled by joy, exhileration and a couple of rather pleasing bottles of crispy white wine. The celebrations went on, long into the night. E-mailing long lost Aussie buddies, texting 'til the network collapses.

Ricky Ponting, Dame Edna Everage, Kylie Minogue, Kevin Rudd, Nicole Kidman, Rolf Harris, Nick Cave, John Eales, Jono Coleman, Ned Kelly your boys took one helluva beating!!

And that was just in 2005! Sweet, wonderful and thoroughly deserved victory!