3-2-1
3 measures of Smirnoff Black label
2 measures of 10 year old white rum
1 large splash of Champagne
A small dash of R.Whites Lemonade (opened left-handed)
2 crushed cubes of ice (Preferrably Evian)
1 slice of lime
Shake Vodka, Rum, Ice and Lemonade before adding splash of Champagne
Serve in half pint straight glass and pretend it's water!
Created by the Great Hector Chumpitaz - Head Barman at the Tivoli/Hippodrome Theatre Eastbourne and keen poker player. Circa 1985
Tuesday, 26 May 2009
The Art of being an English Gentleman (Part 5)
Wake up sober, get up drunk. Sway gently to the beautiful cleansing rhythms of the Modern Jazz Quartet whilst ironing crisp white shirt. Look out of the window of my Marble Arch hotel room. Try to remember the chaos of the night before. Dress in lighted grey three-button summer suit, crisp white aforementioned, silver links, black/sky tie, stout brogues (black). Stroll through the lobby, receive knowing look from the concierge. Thrust myself out into the hubbub of Oxford Street.
Stride purposefully to Piccadilly Circus. Straight into the bar at the Criterion, demand a very large Ted Rogers (see 'Cocktail of the Gods' entry). Down it in one. Plonk self at end of bar, read cricket reports, chuckle at Surrey's plight. Order second Ted. Finish. Step out into afternoon light. Weave way to a small poetry reading in Greek Street, declaim beautiful, hysterical, decadent and romantic verse for two hours. Leave smothered in kisses, with a rather feisty thing called Maisy on my arm, glowing with sheer unadulterated delight. Hail Taxi and head for the banks of the River Thames. Get out, propose undying love to the night, the city and the stars and then head back to Marble Arch.
Wake up drunk, get up later...
Stride purposefully to Piccadilly Circus. Straight into the bar at the Criterion, demand a very large Ted Rogers (see 'Cocktail of the Gods' entry). Down it in one. Plonk self at end of bar, read cricket reports, chuckle at Surrey's plight. Order second Ted. Finish. Step out into afternoon light. Weave way to a small poetry reading in Greek Street, declaim beautiful, hysterical, decadent and romantic verse for two hours. Leave smothered in kisses, with a rather feisty thing called Maisy on my arm, glowing with sheer unadulterated delight. Hail Taxi and head for the banks of the River Thames. Get out, propose undying love to the night, the city and the stars and then head back to Marble Arch.
Wake up drunk, get up later...
Haircut 100
Calling Captain Autumn
Often unfairly derided as being a trite little pop band. I liked the '100, a tight little funk-pop band with top tunes, chunky sweaters, billy whizz guitar chords, deck shoes or brogues, jaunty Beatles caps, sowesters, Triumph Heralds, country pubs, games of cricket, obscure lyrics courtesy of old cheeky chops Heyward and a very fine version of 'Low Rider' by War.
A decidedly more upbeat alternative to Josef K and the rest of the long mac brigade (not that I wasn't adverese to immersing myself in the collected works of Joy Division for months on end - more from them later...)
For additional memories amble through the Pelican West track listing and pick a tune!
Favourite Shirts (Boy Meets Girl, Love Plus One, Lemon Firebrigade, Marine Boy, Milk Film, Kingsize (You're My Little Steam Whistle), Fantastic Day, Baked Bean, Snow Girl, Love's Got Me in Triangles, Surprise Me Again, Calling Captain Autumn +
CD bonus tracks: Boat Party, Ski Club, Nobody's Fool, October Is Orange (day 1 and 2)
Often unfairly derided as being a trite little pop band. I liked the '100, a tight little funk-pop band with top tunes, chunky sweaters, billy whizz guitar chords, deck shoes or brogues, jaunty Beatles caps, sowesters, Triumph Heralds, country pubs, games of cricket, obscure lyrics courtesy of old cheeky chops Heyward and a very fine version of 'Low Rider' by War.
A decidedly more upbeat alternative to Josef K and the rest of the long mac brigade (not that I wasn't adverese to immersing myself in the collected works of Joy Division for months on end - more from them later...)
For additional memories amble through the Pelican West track listing and pick a tune!
Favourite Shirts (Boy Meets Girl, Love Plus One, Lemon Firebrigade, Marine Boy, Milk Film, Kingsize (You're My Little Steam Whistle), Fantastic Day, Baked Bean, Snow Girl, Love's Got Me in Triangles, Surprise Me Again, Calling Captain Autumn +
CD bonus tracks: Boat Party, Ski Club, Nobody's Fool, October Is Orange (day 1 and 2)
Monday, 25 May 2009
Walking back from town
No night buses, taxis, gun culture, knives, muggings...
Just walking along the middle of Seaside Road at two in the morning, singing to the moon. Oh, how the townsfolk loved my unerring renditions of modern day popular classics... The look of love... Fly me to the moon... We don't need that Fascist Groove thang... Felicity... Blue Monday... The hits just kept on coming!
Just walking along the middle of Seaside Road at two in the morning, singing to the moon. Oh, how the townsfolk loved my unerring renditions of modern day popular classics... The look of love... Fly me to the moon... We don't need that Fascist Groove thang... Felicity... Blue Monday... The hits just kept on coming!
Sunday, 24 May 2009
RNLI
Because it's rough out there
The Royal National Lifeboat Institution (RNLI) is a charity that saves lives at sea around the coasts of the British Isles, as well as inshore. Founded by Sir William Hillary (Isle of Man) on 4 March 1824 as the National Institution for the Preservation of Life from Shipwreck, adopting the present name in 1854.
The RNLI operates over 230 lifeboat stations around the coasts of Great Britain and Ireland. Since 1980, lifeboat rescues have doubled; the RNLI rescues an average of 22people each day.
Over 137,000 peoples lives have been saved by the RNLI. Bloody marvellous!
The Royal National Lifeboat Institution (RNLI) is a charity that saves lives at sea around the coasts of the British Isles, as well as inshore. Founded by Sir William Hillary (Isle of Man) on 4 March 1824 as the National Institution for the Preservation of Life from Shipwreck, adopting the present name in 1854.
The RNLI operates over 230 lifeboat stations around the coasts of Great Britain and Ireland. Since 1980, lifeboat rescues have doubled; the RNLI rescues an average of 22people each day.
Over 137,000 peoples lives have been saved by the RNLI. Bloody marvellous!
Thursday, 21 May 2009
Monday, 18 May 2009
Martello Towers
I can see one from my window
Between 1804 and 1812 the British authorities built a chain of towers based on the original Mortella tower to defend the south and east coast of England, Ireland, Jersey and Guernsey to guard against possible invasion from France, then under the rule of the Emperor Napoleon. A total of 103[8] Martello towers were built in England, set at regular intervals along the coast from Seaford, Sussex, to Aldeburgh, Suffolk. Most were constructed under the direction of General William Twiss (1745–1827) and a Captain Ford.[9][10]
The effectiveness of Britain's Martello towers was never actually tested in combat against a Napoleonic invasion fleet. After the threat had passed, the Martello towers in England met a variety of fates. The Coastguard took over many to aid in the fight against smuggling. Fifteen towers were demolished to enable the re-use of their masonry. The sea washed thirty away and the military destroyed four in experiments to test the effectiveness of the new rifled artillery.
During the Second World War, some Martello towers returned to military service as observation platforms and firing platforms for anti-aircraft artillery. Forty-seven have survived in England, a few of which have been restored and transformed into museums (e.g., the tower at St Osyth), visitor centres, and galleries (such as Jaywick Martello Tower). Some are privately owned or are private residences; the remainder are derelict. A survey of the East Coast towers in 2007 found of the 17 remaining, most were in a reasonable condition.
I love the way they hover on the edge of the English coast, standing staunch against the elements and the threat of ancient invasions. They invoke a deep affection in me for the particular stretch of coast from the Wish Tower to Cooden Beach (Soul Bay). So, much so that the house I bought in Normans Bay is 50 yards from one - I wanted to actually buy one but couldn't quite manage to win that argument!
Between 1804 and 1812 the British authorities built a chain of towers based on the original Mortella tower to defend the south and east coast of England, Ireland, Jersey and Guernsey to guard against possible invasion from France, then under the rule of the Emperor Napoleon. A total of 103[8] Martello towers were built in England, set at regular intervals along the coast from Seaford, Sussex, to Aldeburgh, Suffolk. Most were constructed under the direction of General William Twiss (1745–1827) and a Captain Ford.[9][10]
The effectiveness of Britain's Martello towers was never actually tested in combat against a Napoleonic invasion fleet. After the threat had passed, the Martello towers in England met a variety of fates. The Coastguard took over many to aid in the fight against smuggling. Fifteen towers were demolished to enable the re-use of their masonry. The sea washed thirty away and the military destroyed four in experiments to test the effectiveness of the new rifled artillery.
During the Second World War, some Martello towers returned to military service as observation platforms and firing platforms for anti-aircraft artillery. Forty-seven have survived in England, a few of which have been restored and transformed into museums (e.g., the tower at St Osyth), visitor centres, and galleries (such as Jaywick Martello Tower). Some are privately owned or are private residences; the remainder are derelict. A survey of the East Coast towers in 2007 found of the 17 remaining, most were in a reasonable condition.
I love the way they hover on the edge of the English coast, standing staunch against the elements and the threat of ancient invasions. They invoke a deep affection in me for the particular stretch of coast from the Wish Tower to Cooden Beach (Soul Bay). So, much so that the house I bought in Normans Bay is 50 yards from one - I wanted to actually buy one but couldn't quite manage to win that argument!
Friday, 15 May 2009
Heathrow Airport
Touchdown at dawn, having flown half the way round the world. Stumble out from the warm but smelly cocoon of a QF flight into the bitter cold of a Heathrow morning. Traipse three quarters of a mile to passport control. Be greeted by a surly forty something skinhead/Passport control officer. Head down to the luggage reclaim, find that none of the trolleys work properly. Finally find one with a wonky wheel. Join the queue at the carousel. Wait...
...until an hour later the last bag is collected leaving only a trainer and a pushchair slowly circling around. Head through customs, avoid the gaze at all times and flop into the arrivals lounge to be greeted by a row of dodgy cab drivers/chauffers. Try out the cash machine, get lucky. Buy a Guardian and then try to navigate the trolley to the Heathrow Express. Miss the next two london bound trains whilst trying to purchase a ticket. Finally get on board the stopping train to Paddington. Train pulls out of Heathrow Terminal 4. Heave huge sigh of arrival, it's good to be back home!
...until an hour later the last bag is collected leaving only a trainer and a pushchair slowly circling around. Head through customs, avoid the gaze at all times and flop into the arrivals lounge to be greeted by a row of dodgy cab drivers/chauffers. Try out the cash machine, get lucky. Buy a Guardian and then try to navigate the trolley to the Heathrow Express. Miss the next two london bound trains whilst trying to purchase a ticket. Finally get on board the stopping train to Paddington. Train pulls out of Heathrow Terminal 4. Heave huge sigh of arrival, it's good to be back home!
Wednesday, 13 May 2009
Brick Lane
The noise, the smells, the posh & the poor, the curry houses, bakeries, the history. Above all the history that seeps through every inch of this wonderfully mixed up, shook up stretch of East London.
Tuesday, 12 May 2009
The Third Round of the FA Cup
Who put the ball in United's net? Arthur, Arthur
Who put the ball in United's net? Arthur f'in Chelsea!
When the minnows meet the international superstars of the premier league, when the whole town disappears to see their local team (for the first and only time) get utterly mauled by an in-form Championship side and when the local baker makes an FA Cup shaped special with the immortal words “Up for the Cup’ in blue piping on top. Old cup heroes (Chris Kelly of Leatherhead, Ricky George of Hereford Utd etc) are wheeled in front of the cameras and whichever team “Fat Sam” Allardyce manages shows their respect for the oldest cup competition in the world by fielding a team of youth players and loan signings from Ostende FC.
Once the games are underway the best place to capture it is at Stamford Bridge in the East Upper with the three toothed, radio carrying ‘Henge’ stuttering out the results as Chelsea put in a suitably lacklustre performance (later scraping through in a replay at Roots Hall). Meanwhile all the other results are flooding in, Wealdstone Rifles have taken a two goal lead against Cardiff, Man Utd are 4-0 up against West Ham after 5 minutes and Sunderland are losing. Come the half time pint and the morbid second half, a quick dash to the pub to get the final results. Plucky Wealdstone lose 3-2, Man Utd took off 9 players to rest them for a team pub quiz and they still managed to put six past the ‘ammers and Sunderland lost.
The Sunday papers are brim full of the near misses, the thrashings and hope against hope the giant killing – which usually involve one of three teams; Kettering, Blyth Spartans and Crystal Palace. Then it is down the pub to watch the Sunday games, culminating in Spurs losing away to Liverpool. Same thing every year, you can’t beat it!
Who put the ball in United's net? Arthur f'in Chelsea!
When the minnows meet the international superstars of the premier league, when the whole town disappears to see their local team (for the first and only time) get utterly mauled by an in-form Championship side and when the local baker makes an FA Cup shaped special with the immortal words “Up for the Cup’ in blue piping on top. Old cup heroes (Chris Kelly of Leatherhead, Ricky George of Hereford Utd etc) are wheeled in front of the cameras and whichever team “Fat Sam” Allardyce manages shows their respect for the oldest cup competition in the world by fielding a team of youth players and loan signings from Ostende FC.
Once the games are underway the best place to capture it is at Stamford Bridge in the East Upper with the three toothed, radio carrying ‘Henge’ stuttering out the results as Chelsea put in a suitably lacklustre performance (later scraping through in a replay at Roots Hall). Meanwhile all the other results are flooding in, Wealdstone Rifles have taken a two goal lead against Cardiff, Man Utd are 4-0 up against West Ham after 5 minutes and Sunderland are losing. Come the half time pint and the morbid second half, a quick dash to the pub to get the final results. Plucky Wealdstone lose 3-2, Man Utd took off 9 players to rest them for a team pub quiz and they still managed to put six past the ‘ammers and Sunderland lost.
The Sunday papers are brim full of the near misses, the thrashings and hope against hope the giant killing – which usually involve one of three teams; Kettering, Blyth Spartans and Crystal Palace. Then it is down the pub to watch the Sunday games, culminating in Spurs losing away to Liverpool. Same thing every year, you can’t beat it!
Thursday, 7 May 2009
Madness
North London's finest, a national treasure, the nuttiest sound around.
I've just taken receipt of the very fine 'Liberty of Norton Folgate' box set and the joy of the magnificent Madness swept over me once again. I remember seeing them at The Lyceum and the Top Rank in the early 'One Step Beyond' days and I managed to catch them a month ago when they played Luna Park in Sydney. They are still the most danceable, enjoyable and occasional melancholic band going.
So, hats off to Messrs Barson, Chrissy Boy, Woody, Bedders, Monsieur Barso, Lee 'Kix' Thompson and of course Suggs. 1,2,3,4...
I've just taken receipt of the very fine 'Liberty of Norton Folgate' box set and the joy of the magnificent Madness swept over me once again. I remember seeing them at The Lyceum and the Top Rank in the early 'One Step Beyond' days and I managed to catch them a month ago when they played Luna Park in Sydney. They are still the most danceable, enjoyable and occasional melancholic band going.
So, hats off to Messrs Barson, Chrissy Boy, Woody, Bedders, Monsieur Barso, Lee 'Kix' Thompson and of course Suggs. 1,2,3,4...
Saturday, 2 May 2009
Stop the City
Oh happy days. When revolution was just a Special Brew fuelled stroll through London away! Helicopters on demand!
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