Oooh, Look! There’s a Magpie

I’d like to think that I have often been ahead of the curve when it comes to many things, clothes, music, books, films & assorted general trends. However, it turns out I’ve been seriously lagging.  

It transpires that I have been diagnosed with Adult ADHD, much, much later than all the trendy kids… Whilst it accounts for my rather exhausting daily mental gymnastics, it is quite a blessing at being diagnosed as one of the 5.4% of males with the condition, or is it? Or am I? 

Ooh look there’s a Magpie…

To give you an example of what happens in my head. FILTER OFF - I am going to write things in a complete straight line and not edit all the other conversations that pop into my – do you remember On the Buses with Reg Varney or was it Jamie Vardy. Imagine Reg Varney upfront for the Filberts or foxes (Urban foxes are well cool – can’t remember the name of the TV naturalist who likes foxes and has just been diagnosed with Asperger’s, he wears nice knitted t-shirts and likes Punk – Packham that’s his name. Chris Packham. A big fan of Penetration (Lead singer Pauline Murray)).

 

FILTER BACK ON - Ok. I’ll take a break there and press on with my journalistic filter switched well and truly on. I am going to explain just how ADHD manifests in my world. It should be noted, without a hint of irony that I thought about starting this article when I was diagnosed in June 2022.

 

Anyway, I often find myself, drifting off at tangents especially when the subject matter doesn’t interest or when I know what people are going to say before they’ve actually said it. That is often the situation I dislike the most as my behaviour can seem rather rude or dismissive. Yes, yes get on with it etc.

 

FILTER OFF - I’m trying to write this piece and the editor to my right is speaking loudly over her shoulder to no-one in particular. The computer beeps sound like a Kraftwerk outtake and I really must let the radio show know I’m going to be away for two week. Chelsea’s result against City was encouraging. I wish I could type quicker to keep up with my… The Peppermint Liquorice are quite a good band. I’m really looking forward to seeing A Certain Ratio in Reading on Thursday. God, my scalp is itchy, do I think I’ve got COVID (is that a sign). Itchy eyebrows. FILTER BACK ON…

 It is very strange when I can tell exactly how a conversation will proceed. The urge to tell people to cut to the chase can be almost overwhelming. But hopefully, I have established a wide enough array of coping mechanisms to help me in most situations. 

 

Anyway, the purpose for me sharing this information is twofold: 

One - I’ve been looking back at a number of previous posts and I can’t help but wonder what on earth people make of my meanderings. Perhaps this revelation might help.

Two - The fact that my particular lens is tinted by this diagnosis should equally not detract from the point(s) I'm trying to make. 

By the way, the Magpie is still looking in through the window. And having ADHD is like having a meteor storm whizzing across my mind's sky...